In Arab world, family cohesion is a hallmark. However, I am deep down convinced it is not cohesion, but rather a dominion. I know well generalisation is ludicrous to classify this magnificent relationship between parents and their offsprings as an irony fist having the upper hand over everything around , but it is the reality especially where poverty and ignorance are embedded . In Egypt, for instance, divorce rate has been dramatically increasing recently. There are many reasons for this matter.
First and foremost, marriage costs vast amount of money which a middle class man may spend years and decades to make this money. Therefore, parents’ help has become a must to see their grandchildren someday. As most of families fond of showing off making others talk about how much money they spend on the wedding party, dress, banquets, gold, etc. In Islam, marriage is based on love and serenity, but human psyches have converted this sacred connection into a miserable bargain. After wedding parties, parents never stop bragging of how much money they spend since this backwards of making comparison with others. The proof of better lineage is unfortunately based on luxurious appearances, not morals nor education.
Secondly, the bride and her groom decide to marry because they have to marry now not because they want. She should marry to not be called a spinster after a couple of years. He mostly wants to prove his manhood, has children, and so on.
Finally, any quarrel between spouses requires their parents’ interference since they are the funders of this marriage resulting in the most biased judgements. I know some married people who got divorced and their ex-husbands abandoned their parental instinct ensued. Love of grown-ups is genuinely different from that of drama and movies. We, women are affectionate seeking others’ attention all the time as the community ask you to complement the portrait if you were repulsive on your own. Thus, this void will consistently insist on you to fill it with any trash coming across.
As far as I am concerned that as long as your marriage is funded by parents, your familial project is inevitably destructive. In my home, they build houses instead of relationships. They lay down presents, and banquets instead of mercy and acceptance. They care about the furniture quality more than the two persons’ matching and humanity. Marriage is much simpler than this loathsome maze. I wish I get married to a companion with my own money and decisions away from these disgusting norms.